Too long since my last entry in december. My attitude has shifted upward since.
In reviewing previous entries I noticed that the first time I entered BC into this book was on Halloween of last year. (Incidentally, I just realized that this is the first entry of 2009.) It's apparently been around 8 months since we started sleeping together. If memory serves correctly, our first night together was September 30th. The only reason I'm able to remember this date is because I was incredibly sore the next day for my first shift at Glendale Costumes. We've been sleeping together on the regular ever since.
He's told me over and over not to fall in love with him... It's not a deep and passionate yearning to be with him, the feeling is there... I feel like we're both coming into a new skin. Simultaneously realizing that our feelings may run deeper than a bi-weekly romp. Perhaps it's just me. I'm most likely talking out my ass, and he is perfectly content in keeping the relationship we've already established. You can't change a person. As this is a fear of mine, I have remained silent on my feelings. Truth be told, I don't want to mess anything up. But he's so wonderful. Makes me laugh. Loves my writing, which, the narcissist in me says is the biggest turn-on.
What to do, what to do?
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